Yoga teacher and mother Terri Montgomery has been pondering this dilemma and has created a retreat designed to nurture, nourish and encourage us to restore and rejuvenate in order to reach our full potential.

For most of her life Terri says she took on the roles of caretaker, fixer and empath which she says created a lot of stress, responsibility and lack of self-care. Over time she felt that unless she was doing things for others and taking on the carer role, she felt she wasn’t worthy of receiving love.

She says: “I found myself looking outside for love and appreciation only to be disappointed and hurt when my expectations weren’t met.”

She found it was an endless cycle of exhausting herself and then getting frustrated, angry, feeling unloved and unappreciated!

She adds: “You’re the one choosing to put yourself last, not anyone else!”

Terri says she’s learned: It’s Ok to say No!

“It’s so exhausting when you’re living this way, running on adrenaline like a mouse on a wheel – finally stopping when you fall apart.”

“I’ve learnt that I am important and that my needs matter and to give to myself first in order to give to others. I’ve learnt to Love me for me.”

Terri went on a week-long retreat, which changed her life. She discovered that many of us follow negative patterns which we adopt from our parents or rebel against – and when we understand those patterns, we can learn how to communicate clear boundaries with what’s okay and what is not.

“To communicate your needs and have the courage to honour your values, not only helps you but also improves your relationships with those you love,” she says.

“When your needs aren’t met it can spiral into other patterns we’ve learnt when we’re hurting – such as vindictive behaviours of withdrawal, stone walling, frustration, anger, jealousy and loneliness.”

Terri now makes caring for herself a priority and always takes time for a daily yoga practice, such as the heart/lung Yin yoga flow she created – you can practise it too.

» Click here to see this short yin routine

With her experience in meditation and yoga, Terri is holding a yoga retreat in March next year called: Arise to come into Being, aimed at helping you find a deeper understanding of yourself and setting achievable goals.

IYTA DISCOUNT! Terri is offering IYTA members $50 off if you pay in full and book by 17-Jan-2019

The retreat runs from Friday 22 March – Monday 25 March, 2019 at the Gymea Eco and Spa Retreat in Uki, Northern NSW. The retreat will include amazing fresh vegetarian organic food, features a magnesium swimming pool, spa facilities and daily yoga energising and calming suitable for all levels, drawing, dance, meditation, and walks in nature.

To book on or find out more go to Terri’s website: www.yogafit.com.au or call her on 0423 138738